This Time
by L.C. Carraway
Summary: Coming back to Lima has never been easy for Rachel, but Jesse has a plan to make this trip special.


If there was one thing that Rachel Berry hated more ardently than poor musical film adaptations, it was being late. And unfortunately for her, she just so happened to be running late.

As she dashed down the icy New York sidewalks, going as fast as her short legs possibly could in her stilettos, all she could do was curse everything that had made her late that day. Which included herself, as she had regretted her decision to wear heels as soon as she had walked outside and noticed that the sidewalks were covered with a fresh dusting of snow.

Finally, she sighed in relief as her destination came into view. She rushed into the restaurant, ignoring the hostess as she saw her friend's blonde head calmly scanning the people walking by outside the restaurant windows. "I'm so sorry!" she squealed as she finally dropped into the open seat at the table.

Quinn looked vaguely amused, most likely at how flustered Rachel was. As she took in her friend's snow dusted tangle of hair and flushed cheeks, she noted wryly, "I was beginning to think Broadway's newest diva had forgotten about little ole me."

While Rachel smiled at the joke, there was a firmness in her voice when she replied, "Never." Although her pride had kept her from letting on, she had been immeasurably glad when Quinn had told her that she had gotten a job with a law firm in New York earlier that fall. Her friendships with Kurt and Blaine were just as strong as ever, but there was something about having a girlfriend like Quinn around that Rachel found indispensable.

"Did you have rehearsal today?" Quinn asked as she picked around at the salad that was already sitting in front of her. Rachel was thankful that in her lateness, Quinn had already thought to order a glass of sauvignon blanc for her. She took a long, calming drink before responding.

"No," she countered with a shake of her brunette head, "We have our script read through right before the holidays, and then we'll start with rehearsals after the New Year." While Jesse had experienced immense success in the Russel Simmons musical that he had taken the lead in over a year ago, its run had come to an end, and her overarching boyfriend had decided that his next foray into Broadway would be something a little different: directing. He had come across a script that he had fallen in love with, not for himself, but for Rachel. The writer had been unable to resist Jesse's creative vision for the play, and it was slated to open in the spring.

The waiter stopped by and Rachel ordered a cranberry walnut salad before returning her attention to Quinn. "So," she began with a wide smile, "how are you feeling?"

"Huge," Quinn admitted with a wrinkle of her nose, her hand dropping to rest on her growing stomach.

Unable to contain her excitement, Rachel slipped out of her chair and squatted down beside Quinn's chair so that she was eye level with the round tummy. "Oh, not again," sighed Quinn as she dropped her fork.

"Hi baby!" cooed Rachel. "It's your auntie Rachel again, and I can't wait to meet you!"

Quinn shifted uncomfortably as she glanced around at the people who had turned towards Rachel's loud voice. "I'm going to stop meeting you in public."

"Speaking of meeting in public," continued Rachel, "are you and Puck still planning on flying back to Lima with us on Saturday?"

A nostalgic smile graced Quinn's face at the mention of Lima, and she nodded as confirmation. "Is it ever strange, going back to Lima?" she asked as she thought of all the memories that the place held for the both of them.

"Of course," Rachel responded, a little more quietly and less enthusiastically than she had previously been. Quinn pretended not to notice, and Rachel didn't bring it up, but both of their minds had turned to thoughts of who would not be joining them in Lima for the holidays, not that year or any year to come.

They were spared the trouble of changing the subject when Rachel's cell phone rang. She furrowed her eyebrows as she noticed that the number flashing on the screen was from Ohio. She shot Quinn an apologetic look, which Quinn waved off, before she took the call and walked towards the bathrooms of the restaurant. "Rachel Berry speaking," she answered cheerfully.

"Hi, Miss Berry, my name's Kelly Masters, and I'm a business assistant with the Cincinnati Bengals organization."

She cocked an eyebrow, even more confused. "Hi, Miss Masters, what can I do for you today?"

"Well, Miss Berry, we reached out to your agent to extend an invitation to you to sing the national anthem at our game here at Paul Brown Stadium in Cincinnati this upcoming Thursday night before our prime time game."

"O-Oh."

She blinked a few times, trying to absorb the offer. The first thing that came to her mind was that Finn would have loved it. The second was that she wasn't due back in Lima until Saturday, and was it worth it to change her plans so close to the holidays? The third was that she wasn't sure how she even felt about the offer.

"Miss Berry?"

Snapped back to reality, she quickly began to ramble. "Miss Masters, I am incredibly honored by the offer. However, with it being so close to the holidays I'm concerned about rearranging my travel plans, and I'm just not sure if this is something that I'll be able to accept at the moment." She swallowed deeply, feeling nervous for reasons that she wasn't sure she understood yet.

"Well, Miss Berry, we would cover all of your travel arrangements and would be more than happy to provide tickets for your family as well as yourself to the game. I understand your reservations, but it is a nationally televised event that I would love for you to think over. Personally, I saw you in [i]Funny Girl[/i], and I'm a fan. Why don't you think it over for the day, and we can get our answer tomorrow?"

Somehow, Rachel mumbled an agreement before she ended the call and wandered back to her table with Quinn. The blonde was already twirling pasta around her fork, but she put the fork down and dabbed at her mouth with a napkin when she saw Rachel's shell-shocked expression. "What's the matter?"

Rachel looked down at her cell phone, still grasped tightly in her hand. "It was a lady that works for the Bengals," she explained, "They want me to sing the anthem at their game on Thursday."

"That's great, Rach!" Quinn exclaimed, "Thursday night games are all over TV, Puck makes me watch them all the time, even if he doesn't care about who's playing." She rolled her eyes at her husband's football obsession but frowned when she noticed that Rachel wasn't sharing in her amusement.

"It's Finn, isn't it?"

Rachel closed her eyes, steadying herself as she always had to when she heard his name. When she looked at Quinn, she was glad that it was her high school friend that she had been with when she had received the phone call. "Finn loves the Bengals, they're like his Barbra. And I know that Jesse would want to be there to see me do something like this, and you know, he likes football, too, because he says he should be well versed in everything so that he can talk to anyone, and so I know he would love to go, but how can I take Jesse to something that's so important to Finn when-"

Quinn reached out and took one of Rachel's flailing hands, effectively silencing the brunette. "Rachel," she whispered, pain reflecting in her eyes as well, "you know that Finn wants you to be happy. He's going to be so proud that you're singing the anthem at his favorite team's game on national TV. And part of you being happy includes Jesse now, and you and I both know that Finn's okay with that."

After a long moment, Rachel eventually gave a weak smile and returned the pressure of Quinn's hand. With a steadying breath, she replied, "Thank you. Not only for knowing exactly what I was thinking, but it also really means a lot to me that you still refer to him like he's here." She scrunched her nose to ward off the tears before pressing on. "Everyone uses the past tense, and it makes it harder."

Quinn gave her a reassuring smile, which was enough for Rachel. "Well," chuckled the blonde, "since this lunch has been anything but relaxing, I have something to tell you."

"Oh no," laughed Rachel. She picked up her wine glass and frowned at the mostly empty glass. "Should I order another drink first?"

"If only I could join you," Quinn quipped. "Puck and I found out the sex last week."

Instantly, Rachel's face brightened. "Am I going to be an auntie to a mini Quinn or a mini Puck?" They both laughed, before Rachel realized, "Oh god, mini-Puck sounds terrifying."

"Well, luckily we have a little time to prepare for that," Quinn countered, "It is a mini Quinn this time."

Rachel sighed a little "oh" as she put a hand over her chest. Knowing that she was nowhere near ready for children, she had been living vicariously through Quinn's pregnancy, and had sworn to be the most devoted aunt ever to the little Puckerman. The news that it was going to be a little girl that Rachel could dress up and bestow a love of all things Barbra on brightened her mood monumentally.

"There's something else," Quinn admitted. This time, Rachel did signal for another glass of wine, and Quinn politely waited until Rachel's glass was full again. "I know that it meant a lot to all of us when Mr. Schue and Miss Pillsbury named their son after him, so it was pretty easy for Puck and I to choose a name."

"Fionna Heloise."

_F.H._

She desperately tried to call a show face, but it was impossible. Rachel's eyes filled with tears she couldn't contain, and she had to cover her mouth to bite back a sob. "Oh, come here!" Quinn ordered, her own eyes brimming as well. The girls wrapped their arms around each other, and in an attempt to lighten the mood, Quinn teased, "I thought you left your crybaby phase behind in eleventh grade."

Rachel did indeed laugh, and when they parted, she managed to compose herself enough to whisper, "Thank you."

Quinn squeezed her arm. "Well, now that we're absolute messes, I suppose it's time for us to go home to the men," she noted with a snort. Rachel laughed in agreement, and after they had paid their checks and were about to part, Quinn caught Rachel's arm again. "I really think you should do the Bengals game," Quinn admitted, "I think it'll be healing, and I know it'll be good for your career. And if you need me to be there, Puck and I will change our flights in an instant."

"Thanks, Quinn," smiled Rachel. She still wasn't sure about the game, but it was good to know that her friend would be by her side if she did decide to go through with it.

While the cold winter weather had made walking anywhere lately feel like it took years, Rachel soon found herself standing in front of her building after what only felt like a few seconds. Her head was still fuzzy and full, but she took a deep breath and began to climb the stairs to her apartment.

When she stepped inside, she noticed a pair of keys laying on the island in the kitchen and a jacket flung over the back of the couch, a sign that Jesse was home. She smiled as she hung up her own keys and coat, as well as his. Usually when he came home with an idea for the play, he would drop whatever he had to retreat to his office.

Her suspicions proved correct when she found him sitting at his desk, hunched over the script that had been almost his constant companion lately. "Hi," she smiled, leaning against the door frame.

"Hey, babe," he greeted her, though his eyes didn't leave the script, "How was lunch with Quinn?"

She heaved a deep sigh instead of responding, and Jesse glanced up. "Something happen?"

"It's just something that I wanted to talk to you about if you have a minute," she shrugged.

"Uh..." He bit his lip and glanced back down at the script for a moment, then back to Rachel. It was obvious that something was bothering her, so he assured her, "I always have a minute for you," before he tossed the paper clipped stack onto his desk and turned his chair towards her, beckoning her forward. She smiled appreciatively as she crossed the room and took a seat on his knee.

It took her a minute, but finally, she spoke. "Quinn and Puck are having a girl," she announced, surprising herself in the process as she had been meaning to tell him about the Bengals offer. "Fionna Heloise."

Jesse put a reassuring hand on the small of her back. "That's a beautiful name." He sought out her eyes, trying to smile at her and see if she was okay, but she looked away. "Is there something else?" he asked, eyebrows knit together in confusion, "You seem pretty upset, and I thought the name would make you happy."

She leaned forward, putting her elbows on her knees and pressing her hands into her eyes. "The Bengals want me to sing the national anthem at their game on Thursday night, and I'm scared to do it, because I don't want to mess up, of course, but also the Bengals are Finn's favorite, and I'm just afraid that maybe it's too soon, and how would he feel if I brought you, but of course I want you to be there, but..." She took a huge gulp of air, unsure of what else there was to say.

Gently, Jesse pulled her hands away from her eyes. "I don't want you to doubt for a second that you can do this. You, Rachel Berry, are a star," he assured her.

_I named it Finn Hudson, because there's already a star named Rachel Berry, and she's right here on Earth, and she's brighter than any of those stars up there._

After a small pause, he added, "Rach, obviously Finn and I weren't close, but I'm pretty sure that I knew the guy well enough to say with confidence that few things would make him happier than seeing you and his favorite football team shine together. You can believe that when you do this, which you will because it's an amazing opportunity, Finn's gonna be there with you."

_So I just wanted to make sure that whenever she feels lonely she can look up in the sky and no matter where I am, she can know that I'm looking down on her._

For what felt like the millionth time that day, Rachel's eyes burned with tears, and she leaned forward to hug Jesse, unsure of what else she could say. While he had been cocky and a career driven machine during their high school days, Jesse had changed enough that since he had stepped into the auditorium to sing "Listen to Your Heart" with her, Rachel had never doubted that he would be in her corner. He had lost her completely before, and there was no way Jesse St. James was going to squander his second chance.

"Now," he smirked when she pulled away, "I believe you have a phone call to go make, Miss Berry."

Rachel smiled, feeling ready to agree to the offer. "Thank you," she smiled as she stood up, "I'll let you get back to your work now, Mr. Director."

"Know what?" Jesse stood up as well. "I'm done for the day. What do you say we order some takeout from The Organic Grill and pop in a rom com?"

"No musicals?" Rachel asked, cocking an eyebrow.

Jesse put his arms around her waist, pulling her close enough to plant a kiss on the tip of her nose. "You've had a pretty exhausting day, so I think I would end up carrying all of the duets," he teased her. "Hardly seems fair, does it?"

"You're right," she sighed in mock disappointment, "Cheesy Nicholas Sparks and tofu masala it is then."

He laughed and let her go. "I'll order while you make your call."

Rachel grabbed her cell phone from her purse and wandered out of the office towards their bedroom. Kelly Masters picked up after the first ring and sounded quite excited to hear from the young actress. "Hi, Miss Masters," Rachel smiled as she wandered to her closet. She stepped inside and began absentmindedly flicking through her sweaters. "Is the offer still on the table?"

"Of course! We would love to have you."

Rachel smiled as she finally settled on the orange sweatshirt that Finn had bought her years ago in anticipation of a play-off game. She had been confused by the game the entire time, though she cheered convincingly whenever Finn and Burt did. Despite her enthusiasm, the Bengals hadn't made it past the first round, causing Finn to curse a man named Andy Dalton for the rest of the week, but it had been fun doing something that was so important to Finn. Even though she hated the glaringly bright orange of the sweater, she had held on to it almost as tightly as the memory of that day.

"I would love to be a part of the day then," Rachel smiled as she pulled the sweater off the hanger and hugged it to her chest. Jesse was right. Finn would certainly be there with her.


End file.
